Two to Tango?

Japanese people!! Just amazing! The girls are small and cute (like me!) and go all squeally when they see me, which gets me all excited so I run around like crazy and they squeak even more so I jump up some more and start barking and then...then they get all scared and The Boss comes over and shouts at me! Well excuse me, but if she didn't get me all wound up in the first place then there wouldn't be a problem, so why don't you shout at her?! Hmph!

Life is so not fair. Why can't things be straightforward? Sometimes I just don't understand at all. Like why can I play with Italian Bear's shoes, but no-one else's? Why does everyone get to eat yummy pasta and cheese and salad and sausage and tomatoes and mince, except me? Why is it OK for The Boss to pee in the house, but not me? (They have a special room called 'Il Bagno', but I have to go outside!! The cheek of it). How is it acceptable to torment me by leaving literally hundreds of perfectly chewable items lying around the floor and only allowing me to chew about FOUR of them!! When it comes to making a decision between getting told off for sniffing around in the bin and finding something delicious in there, it's hard for me to make the 'right' choice!

According to The Boss though, things are much more complicated when you're not a dog. Decisions can be the difference between a great experience and a horrific once, between being loved and being hated, between being rich and being broke, even between life and death. One minute movement and your life is changed forever. Once she made a decision to go to Rome instead of Venice for her holiday and that's where she met the Italian Bear. This changed her life completely (In a good way she adds). She talks about someone called Fate and I find it a little confusing. Apparently Fate is someone that decides your future. So for example Fate would be responsible for the fact Japanese Guy accidentally dropped some delicious chicken on the floor yesterday, while I just happened to be in the vicinity of the kitchen table. So it wasn't Japanese Guy who gave me the chicken, it was Fate. Even though i didn't smell, hear or see Fate anywhere.

I'm not sure whether I agree with The Boss on this one though. Surely if Fate wanted me to have some chicken she would give it to me, regardless of where I happen to be at the time? But if I was not in the kitchen, how could I have found the chicken? At the same time, if it were not for Fate, would I have been in the kitchen at all? Or would Japanese Guy been a bit more careful with his food? Personally I don't think Fate is a solitary animal. Perhaps she is the leader of the pack. She lives amongst others such as Luck, Timing, Sense, Knowledge, Emotion and Ability. The pack works together on every scenario but Fate decides what the outcome of each play will be.

So what if I had made a different decision? Let's say Japanese Guy makes his chicken sandwich and sits down at the table. I come strolling into the kitchen and that sweet aroma hits my nostrils making every nerve in my body twitch. In my head I know I shouldn't jump up, heaven knows I've been told enough times! But that chicken is calling me! I can't stand it any longer so I jump up right at that panino....but wait, Japanese Guy wasn't expecting that and now it looks as though a bit of that chicken has got stuck in his throat. Help! I'm only a pup and I really don't think I can do that 'Heimlich Manoeuvre' thingy, what do I do??

Every scenario has hundreds of variables and thousands of potential outcomes, if not more. What puzzles me is why one outcome favours another. Is it really Fate? Is everything 'meant to be'? Or is it just completely random? Either way doesn't seem like a particularly good answer to me. When your life is touched by tragedy what explanation do you prefer? That everything happens for a reason and this is Fate. Or that life is totally random and sometimes seemingly unfair. When things work out for the best is that just a coincidence, or is it because Fate wanted it that way?

When something good happens we don't tend to dwell on the matter so much. However when it's bad news we always look for something or someone to blame. When I was happily munching on my gift of chicken I didn't care if it was Fate, Coincidence or Good Fortune. If things had been different and I'd found myself choking on a chicken bone, would I have been so willing to accept my Fate? Would you? Or would you put the blame on Japanese Guy for not being careful enough with his chicken? Perhaps the fault lies with the vendor for not advertising that chicken contains bones? Or what about the chicken herself, is she entirely blameless in this scenario? Maybe we should sue Fate herself, after all if it was her decision then surely the blame rests squarely on her shoulders....

French Kissing

So, I've been working at the hostel for over two weeks now and in this time I've smelt loads of fantastic feet (I just love the smell of feet! And shoes, OMG the best invention ever!). I've smelt feet from all over the world; Mexico, Canada, Australia, Brazil, USA, Germany, Spain, England, New Zealand, Korea, Wales, Japan....the list goes on. But do you know which ones are my favourite? The French Ones.

Before you cry out in rage and dismay, let me explain a few things.

I'm an Italian dog of German descent working for an English Boss and an Italian Bear (Maybe he's not really an actual Bear, but he's big, hairy, cuddly and roars at me when I'm naughty so I think he might be one). I know I should hate the French. I've heard all the stories about how rude they are, how they snub speaking English, or if your French is less than perfect they refuse to even acknowledge you, they eat weird and disgusting food, they smell of garlic, they're unhelpful, they're unfriendly, have no sense of humour, blah blah blah.

Well, I disagree. All the French people at our hostel have been amazing. They either speak English fluently or apologise profusely for their lack of understanding. When The Boss digs deep into the bowels of her brain and recoups her most basic of French, they respond with warmth. When the Italian Bear sold some French guy's beds to some Mexican girls, the French actually THANKED him for letting them sleep on the floor! Their food is yummy and they even have cheese that smell like feet! My two favourite things in one, amazing! They always fuss me and kiss me and don't mind a bit when I steal their shoes, and they spend hours chatting to The Boss and The Bear. They're quiet, they don't complain, they always pay on time without having to be asked....The Boss even went so far as to say they might be her favourite breed of guest (but she asked me not to tell any English people she said that).

So is this blatant racism against the French warranted? It's hard to say, mostly because I've never met the French on their own turf. Maybe the people we get here are different because they're travelling and staying at a hostel? Or maybe these are a new generation of French people who have realised the error of their ways? Without having a good sniff of every French person's feet, I couldn't tell you. But what you do realise from working here in the hostel is that you can never judge a person by their nationality alone. Nor can you tell an awful lot just by looking at their clothes, listening to their stories or checking their passports. No, it's much more complicated than that. Something that takes a certain talent to uncover. I believe there exists a phrase 'Never judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes' but in my opinion you don't need to walk the mile, you just need to give those shoes a good sniff, mmmmmm!